Soooo, I’m back from a l o n g hiatus. Welllllll, not back back officially, but half-way back. Little by little, piece by piece, day by day, step by step I am feeling closer to home i.e. self.
Since we last spoke, I did a thing x 2. We officially committed to doing life together (me and my love) AND we created a new life together (mind you, my body did ALL the heavy lifting–figuratively and literally). And, now that you have connected those dots, yes, we planned an intimate micro wedding and I grew and safely delivered a healthy nine pound baby boy; our R e i g n b e a u. Proof there is happiness after the storm.
This time, I felt really inside out when I was expecting. That same feeling when your shirt is on inside out, but on steroids. There was major discomfort, my body signed up for every pregnancy symptom that you could Google, and there was no one around who could truly share in my experience (which was a lonely place to be). I am beyond grateful for a natural pregnancy AND it was a tough one. I am learning that it is acceptable to use “yes, and” language. I never took maternity photos, because I didn’t feel like myself, so far from home. Plus, I don’t believe in following rules and/or customs simply because everyone else did it or is doing it. This mommy and me photo is me clapping loudly f o r the place I am standing in now, f o r the nine months of unbearable growing pains, f o r withstanding natural labor pains at the hands of an voluntary past my due date induction, f o r the months and months of around the clock extreme dedication to breastfeeding, f o r reclaiming my old body and accepting the new, f o r giving up sleep for the last nine months; I am/we are the G.O.A.T.
There are so many branches to my growth in 2021; I am stuffed and overflowing with new experiences to reflect on and share. So, let’s see how this goes! I’m recommitting to this space and welcoming myself back. Back to doing more things that fill me up and make me more whole inside.
So that’s the short version of how M Y S Y D N E Y J A M E S has expanded; my world now includes a new heartbeat and a forever partner. Before I run off to manage all the things and tiny humans, I’ll gift you (for now) with this clip that continues to resonate with me in this new chapter.
Amber (with a new last name)